https://www.elazarbloom.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/2FEAF0DD-B9E9-4506-8458-D9C783307F8D_1_105_c-e1605813765477.jpeg 583 883 Rabbi Elazar Bloom, LMFT https://www.elazarbloom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/logo-9-mar.png Rabbi Elazar Bloom, LMFT2020-11-19 19:23:112020-11-19 19:23:11Hide and Seek with Shevy
My 5 year old daughter and I have a weekly tradition where on Shabbat (Saturday) morning we play a game of hide and seek together. When I hide, she seeks and the game goes as it should. When SHE hides, I pretend not to know where she is for a little while (even though she hides in the same 2-3 spots every time) and as I seek, inevitably, it becomes too much for her to bear and within 15 seconds or so she screams out:
“HERE I AM”!
And every time I try and explain to her that the point of the game is NOT to tell the other person where you are. The point of the game is NOT to get found.
It doesn’t help.
You see, she is wired for connection. She cannot imagine a goal where the long term plan is to stay hidden, separated from someone you love for any extended period of time.
“HERE I AM”
I am also wired for connection. AND I can easily imagine a long term goal of being hidden and separate from someone you love. Sometimes it’s safer that way. Sometimes it’s less painful.
So, when I find a really good hiding spot and I squeeze my middle aged body into a desk nook or behind a couch, I don’t say “HERE I AM”, but when it becomes too much and SHE says:
“MAKE A NOISE!”
I do, because hiding eventually gets old for us all.