Permissive with Feelings, Strict with Behaviors (Korach)

Reading the story of Korach in this week’s parsha, it’s not difficult to identify with him. He felt overlooked and mistreated. Given the circumstances, those feelings are understandable and yet the course of action that he took was severely punished.

A common parenting misstep is to think that by validating a child’s feelings we also validate the behavior that results from those feelings. Not true.

Be permissive with feelings and strict with behaviors.

Help her accept and process her emotions. Help her regulate them with compassion and support.  And then, share appropriate ways that she can respond as you help her become a person that is not only aware of her own experience but sensitive to how her actions affect others.