Forgive (for) Yourself

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I often have trouble forgiving others because of what I experienced as a result of what they said or did to me. Nobody was there for me in that pain and I actually believed some of the "not good" I was feeling about myself in those moments. Not wanting to feel that, I would blame the other person as being a mean, insensitive, uncaring, selfish, etc. That was all I could do to protect myself, but…

Courage v. Ambition

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Courage is the willingness to show up and serve life, while accepting the inevitable pain and discomfort involved. Ambition is the need to prove that I am significant by what I can accomplish in life, avoiding pain and discomfort as much as possible. Courage is rooted in love and abundance. Ambition is rooted in fear and scarcity. Courage sees others as equals. Ambition sees others as…

My Teenage Tears, Toxic Shame and Hakuna Matata

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I recently had the pleasure of watching the Lion King with my daughter and nephew. I originally saw it in the theatre when it came out in 1994. I was 18 at the time. It had me in serious tears and I had no idea why. It was actually quite embarrassing because I couldn't hide the tears. It was one of those cries where as hard as you try, the tears won't go back in. Anyway, I liked the original…

The Second Time Around

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"Live as if you were already living for the second time." - V. Frankl This is helpful to me. It gently acknowledges that I get stuck. It makes space for the fear and other motivations outside my awareness that bring me to react to life and other people in a certain way. It acknowledges how that leads to consequences and experiences that may not be in sync with how I truly want to show up…

Are You Avoiding Me?

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Yesterday a friend asked me if I was working on Tisha B'Av. I answered "no". I later thought about how nice it would be to work, or better yet, to sleep. To go unconscious and wake up Friday morning not having to worry about it until next Summer. What am I trying to avoid? It is not as if I have experienced the Temple or anything directly associated with it to feel the loss I am supposed…