Not That Place...

It's fascinating (and somewhat frustrating) that the vulnerable place within myself that I protect (and subsequently reject) is the most fertile ground for deep connection with my spouse. Our rejection of this common (human) ground makes us strangers to one another. Our embrace of this common (human) ground creates a bond of acceptance and safety that sustains us for a lifetime.

What if They Knew?

"A relationship starts to become real when it's broken and begins to heal." This quote hangs in my office. A client entrenched in a troubled relationship recently took a picture of it and we began to talk. The essence of that conversation can be distilled to the following point: If only couples understood that moments of pain are ready to be mined for deep vulnerable connection.…